The Department of Government Efficiency( DOGE) issued a new update in its ongoing audit of the Small Business Association (SBA). This program has been a significant focus for DOGE, which has issued weekly updates on its findings on X. In the most recent update, Elon Musk announced that new common-sense checks would cut widespread fraud.
For context, Elon and DOGE have been investigating the problems with ‘vampire’ social security numbers. These numbers are either too old or too young to be used for loans or benefit claims,and Musk has targeted these accounts in his ongoing crusade against corruption.
In any case, the investigation began when Elon Musk discovered the massive number of Social Security numbers over 120 years old. He posted, “According to the Social Security database, these are the numbers of people in each age bucket with the death field set to FALSE! Maybe Twilight is real and there are a lot of vampires collecting Social Security.”
DOGE replied to this post, explaining the significance of these ‘vampires.’ The department posted, “In 2020-2021, @SBAgov issued 3,095 loans, including PPP (Paycheck Protection Program) and EIDL (Economic Injury Disaster Loan), for $333M to borrowers over 115 years old who were still marked as alive in the Social Security database. In one case, a 157-year-old individual received $36k in loans.”
Nearly a month after Musk’s initial post, DOGE announced that on March 23, 2024, they had made a significant move to close this loophole. They said, “As of Friday, @SBAgov now: – Requires date of birth collection for all direct loan applications – Pauses the direct loan process for those under 18 and above 120 years old. Basic sanity checks like these are initial steps toward minimizing fraud in government payment programs.”
Most recently, Elon took to Fox News to explain how this fraud works. He joked, “$330 million worth of loans to people under the age of 11. I think the youngest…was a nine-month-old who got a $100,000 loan. That’s a very precocious baby we’re talking about here.”
Watch the clip here:
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In the comments section, users were incensed by the waste. One user reacted to the apparent absurdity by saying, “This is outright criminal and a disgrace to the system! $330 million in SBA loans to children under 11? A 9-month-old getting $100,000? This isn’t just fraud, it’s a coordinated, institutional failure that funneled taxpayer money into the hands of criminals.”
Some replied that they wanted to see charges brought against the perpetrators. One comment read, “Where’s the accountability? Who approved these loans? PROSECUTIONS must happen NOW! These fraudsters stole money meant for struggling businesses. This should be a top priority for investigators—no more excuses!”
Other comments agreed with Elon’s diagnosis of the problem. A reply read, “Fraudulent loans to infants? That’s a new low! Agreeing with the shocking revelation about the Small Business Administration’s $330M blunder. Time to tighten the screws and ensure taxpayer money isn’t funding baby businesses! 
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Featured image from embedded video