The new Chris Rock Netflix special, “Selective Outrage,” is out and is predictably hilarious. Though on woke Netflix, Rock tore into numerous leftist totems, particularly woke corporations and Meghan Markle. As such, the comedy special was full of hilarious jokes. Here are the top five best from it
(1) No One Needs Your Woke Yoga Pants
Though Rock’s jokes about Will Smith’s slap and the selective outrage of cancel culture got the lion’s share attention, Rock’s stand up special was at its best when he tore into woke corporate advertising. Particularly, he mocked woke Lululemon and its woke yoga pants ads, saying:
“I was in the mall the other day, I went by the store Lululemon, I walk by and in the window of every Lululemon there’s a sign that says, ‘we don’t support racism, sexism, discrimination, or hate.’ And I’m like, ‘who gives a f***?’ You’re just selling yoga pants. I don’t need your yoga pants politics.”
Continuing, he added “They sell $100 yoga pants. $100 dollar yoga pants!” Rock says. “They hate somebody. They hate the poor.”
(2) Words Don’t Hurt, Punches and Bricks Do
The next funniest joke of “Selective Outrage” came when Rock was mocking cancel culture, saying that words don’t hurt unless they’re written on a brick.
Speaking on that, he first said “I’m gonna try to do a show tonight without offending nobody. K? I’m gonna try my best. You know why? You never know who might get triggered. That’s right. You say the wrong things, motherfuckers get scared. You gotta watch out. You know what people say — they always say — ‘words hurt.”
Adding to that, he said “Anybody that says that words hurt has never been punched in the face. Words hurt when you write them on a brick.”
(3) Your Woke Phone Was Made by Child Slaves
Related to the woke advertising comment was Rock’s joke that the people tweeting woke things from their Apple phone ignore the fact that their phone was made by child slaves abroad. Joking about that, Rock said:
“The thing I have a problem with is the selective outrage. Motherf***ers typing out woke a*s tweets on a phone made by child slaves. Not only is everybody full of s***, every business is full of s***.”
(4) Meghan Markle Isn’t Oppressed and the Royal Family Isn’t “Racist”
Was the royal family “racist” when it wondered what color the baby Meghan Markle was having with Prince Harry would be? No. And she’s ridiculous for suggesting that their comments were “racist.” Joking about that, Rock said:
“‘Oprah, they’re so racist they wanted to know how brown the baby was going to be.’ ’m like, ‘That’s not racist, because even black people want to know how brown the baby going to be. S*** we check behind the ears – that’s a scientific test because you’ve got to know what kind of black child you going to get.’”
“I know her dilemma: black girl trying to be accepted by her white in-laws. Oh it’s hard. It’s so hard, it’s very hard – but it ain’t as hard as a white girl trying to be accepted by her black in-laws. Now that s*** is really hard. Meghan Markle, I know the dilemma. I’m like, ‘If you black and you wanted to be accepted by your white in-laws then you need to marry a Kardashian because they accept everybody.’”
(5) Abortion Is Killing Babies
What is abortion? It’s the murder of babies. Putting that clearly in his comments on it, Rock said:
“I believe women should have the right to kill babies. That’s right! I’m on your side! I believe you should have the right to kill as many babies as. you want. Kill them all! I don’t give a fuck!”
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